I was shaken. I walked through the train station, fighting back tears and nausea. I had been horribly sick while away from home. Alone. These last few days had been rough. The last six months had been rougher – filled with way too many funerals. Way too much loss for me and for some dear friends. I was worn out. I just wanted to get home. I struggled down the station’s stairs with two suitcases. The escalator only went up. And apparently I was invisible. No one helped me with my bags. No one. I rushed to the platform just in time to see the train blow right past me. I just stood there. Shaken. Sick. Crying. (I hope they don’t keep the security videos. I was a real mess.) I called my husband Tim. He lovingly, powerfully prayed for me. I just couldn’t pray for myself. Not right then. I was so worn out. So shaken.
While on the train (I finally caught one), Tim sent me a text message with the Scripture below. Tim used God’s Word to call me to remember who I am in Jesus. And to remember the power and confidence that I have within me – to endure. Even when I am shaken.
Remember those earlier days after you had received the light, when you endured [stood your ground] in a great conflict full of suffering. So do not throw away your confidence; it will be richly rewarded…we do not belong to those who shrink back and are destroyed, but to those who have faith and are saved. – Hebrews 10:32, 35, 39
I felt God’s shouting out to me through His Word and from His love: “Remember who you are! C’mon, girl! Get your head together. I Am with you! I have given you My Light! Do not allow the darkness to swallow you up! Remember all you and I have already conquered! You have gone through tougher times than these! Don’t fall apart now! Stand your ground! Endure! Stand firm on My Truth! I know you’re shaken! But fight! Fight for your peace! Fight for your perspective! Remember who you are! Remember who I Am! I Am your confidence! Remember that! Do not shrink back! I Am Greater than this! Do not be destroyed! I Am your very Life! I Am your very Strength! Remember who you are! Remember Who and What you believe! Remember you are Saved for all Eternity! Don’t lose your confidence now! Not about these things that will not last! Remember you are Mine! Endure! Stand your ground! Fiercely! Powerfully! Tenaciously! Stand your ground with complete humility before Me and with complete confidence and faith in Me as you remember who I Am!”
This Scripture. This specific message from God overwhelmed me with God’s intimacy to me and the power of God’s Word for me. Right then. Right there. I started to breathe deeply again even as the tears still rolled down my face. I was being quieted in my soul. I was being strengthened in my deepest core. I started to focus again on God’s grace and truth, hope and strength, peace and courage. I started to focus again on Jesus. Really, really focus on Jesus.
God never asks us to deny our reality or pretend it isn’t hard. Really hard at times. God is the Truth, and He certainly doesn’t expect us to lie or to be falsely peaceful or pretend to be strong in any way. At any time. What God does ask of us is to give Him our heads and hearts again and again. Fully. Continually. In the sweet times. In the rough times. And always remember who we are in Him!