Not long ago, my heart was breaking, with an almost inescapable sadness and a sense of complete helplessness, for someone I love beyond expression. This precious one was lost in pain and trauma – physically, mentally, emotionally, relationally and spiritually. In my heartbroken, worn out and helpless state, I sat with my Abba and His living and active Word. I listened to Him and I shared my heart in uncovered and raw ways. Here is a piece of our conversation as I read, prayed and wrote about God’s eternal words from Isaiah 40:28-29.
Do you not know? Have you not heard?
My Lord, I do know. And, yes, my Lord, I have heard.
And I believe You, my Lord, even now when my heart is breaking for this precious one.
The LORD is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth.
Thank You, my Lord, that You are the eternal, everlasting God.
Thank You that You are the Creator of the ends of the earth.
Thank You that You are the Sovereign God who rules for all eternity.
Even when circumstances and people are so unruly. Even when I am so heavy hearted.
Lord, You are still God. And You are good.
He will not grow tired or weary, and his understanding no one can fathom.
Thank You, my Lord, that You do not grow tired or weary. Because I am so tired.
I am so weary. My eyes are heavy from crying and my heart is so very sad.
Thank You that Your understanding, Your wisdom and Your knowledge are unfathomable. Your mind – Your understanding – is so far beyond mine. Thank You for that.
You are omniscient, Lord. There is nothing You do not know.
There is nothing You do not understand. You alone have the perfect knowledge and eternal perspective that I do not have. That I will never have on this side of Heaven.
Thank You, Lord. I trust You in my tiredness. In my weariness.
I trust You in my seriously limited understanding.
He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak.
I don’t feel strong or powerful right now, Lord. Not at all, Lord.
But I do know…and I have heard…and I have experienced…Your strength and Your power. And I know You are faithful and true to Your Word. I know that Your strength and Your power are here with me and within me through Your Spirit.
For now, my Lord, I will just rest. Rest my breaking heart, rest my weary soul and trust You.
I will curl up in Your love and press into Your faithfulness.
I will trust that You have all that I need.
And I will trust that You have all that the one for whom my heart is breaking needs too.
Thank You, my Lord, my God and my King. Thank You, my Abba.
Sometimes the only thing any of us can do is trust God. Trust, in itself, is God’s Spirit with us, comforting our breaking hearts and holding our weary minds, bodies and souls. May our Lord increase our trust in Him – with our own lives and with all those we love so deeply and dearly.
In love, peace and purposeful passion,